Life List Check In

So it would seem that summer has come to an end and the kids are back at school (collective sigghhhhhhhh). This also means it has been a few months since I last mentioned the life list (formerly known as the bucket list) and did a check in to see what everyone had going on.

I am kind of excited to say that my list continues to evolve. This summer was an amazing summer and I am truly grateful for all the wonderful times I had and that I had opportunities to experience a couple things on my list (whoohoo)and of course add a few more :) Funny how that works! Here is my update on my current goal list, please let me know what you have been up to and what's on your list :)

During the next_____I plan to:

1 year
Go skydiving
Learn Spanish to Fluency
Learn to knit (I promised leg warmers!)

5 years
Run a 5k, 10k, half marathon, and a full marathon (I'm nuts right? Bring it!)

Write a book

Travel to at least 1 country I've never been to


10 years

A Triathlon

Learn to play golf (it cant all be exciting!)

Learn to sail

Hike Machu Picchu

Gratitude for Me...Really??

I have long been a believer in living in gratitude and giving thanks for all the wonders in our world, and I have really come into my own in the past few years and feel comfortable in my skin...an odd and wonderful feeling for anyone.
I feel in an odd place that I am feeling grateful for my body. Ok, this may be a good cue for males to bow out as they may not fully get this....gone?....ok good....
Women are not encouraged to be comfortable or confident with themselves and this is unfortunate...
That is why I want to take this opportunity to give thanks to my body. Yep I said it! MY BODY!
Ok that is not meant to sound egotistic my any means, so let me clarify.

I am committed to living a wonderful life and just as I am grateful for my care for getting me to and from school drop offs and swimming lessons and playdates, I am grateful for my body for all that it does for me.....wow, novel huh....just think about it....what does yours do for you?

-I am grateful for legs that on any morning will run me several miles through the fresh morning air in the countryside.

-I am grateful for arms that surround those I love

-I am grateful for hands that comfort, work and complete.

-I am grateful for a mind that continually seeks knowledge and growth.

-I am grateful for a heart that is open, honest and sees that world with love.

-I am grateful for a spirit that is always seeking adventure.

-I am grateful for a soul that can find the good.

-I am grateful for a body that gave me my beautiful children.

The Age of Distraction

This has been a growing frustration for me and I really feel the majority of the general population is oblivious to it's impact or has simply decided to shrug it off.
I have to admit that I am far from innocent on this issue, but I can at least admit to it and try to better myself.

We have become ADD as a society and it drives me bonkers. When was the last time that anything had your complete, undivided attention? There is so much noise and distraction that few things, if any get the quality time and attention they deserve.
Really, think about it, when was the last time you completely devoted yourself to a task? A conversation without being distracted by your phone, your email, a passing noise...etc.

It is inevitable I will be out to dinner with friends and everyone's iphones/droids are out...sunnyside up. Are we looking for a distraction? Can we not just focus and give someone/thing our undivided attention anymore? Or do we feel that we may be missing out on something else?

I feel that it is having a negative impact on our everyday lives. Don't get me wrong, I love technology and all the assets it brings to my life, like being able to work from home, but really we have become a distracted society.

I gave myself a challenge a couple weeks ago. I made a list of things I needed to accomplish and set myself to do them, distraction-free.....it was hard! I mean HARD!

But really what I learned was that I can do it and it was amazing the incredible feeling of clarity that I had in my tasks and the efficiency of which I did them. It was a relief to not be distracted. I felt productive and accomplished.

It is nice to be able to identify the distractions and the time vampires and be able to focus. I do worry though about the generation of 20 somethings coming up that have never experienced being able to focus without distraction. When did it become the norm to text while driving or surf the internet while working? I never would have dreamed it a few years ago and yet, now it is common place. Is it possible to teach such a skill, if so the window of opportunity for modeling this behavior is quickly coming to an end.

Women....

It being International Women's Day, you sort of had to figure that I would step up on my soap box...just a little....I apologize in advance for anyone I may offend, but I truly speak out of love, so try to see it from that perspective.

Ok, with my disclaimer clearly stated, let's get down to business.
First off I am very grateful for all the amazing women in my life. I am fortunate to be surrounded by women who are passionate and caring. There are mothers, wives, educators, clinicians, lawyers, professors, students...etc. I have so much respect and learn so much from having such amazing women in my life.

That being said, I have one bone to pick with our sex. That is that I feel women are so incredibly hard on one another (not to mention ourselves). We are all battling so many of our own choices and trying to be so many people and fill so many roles that it hardly seems just that we are so hard on one another. One of the most epic battles is between the stay-at-home moms and the working moms. I can be the first one to admit that neither role is easy and neither one is the perfect fit for everyone on everyday.
I had to go back to work when my oldest was only 5 weeks old and i have felt that guilt, but also enjoyed those moments of pure silence in the car when it was only me. We all make really difficult choices and women have the amazing ability to beat themselves up emotionally, but we really should try to avoid doing it to one another.

Instead of feeling that the grass is always greener and thinking that the other team has an unfair advantage, can't we just agree that both sides kind of have it rough on somedays and fabulous on other days? Can we just agree to support one another and take both the victories and defeats together as a team, rather than trying to compete? I'm just sayin.....

Ok, I will step off of the soapbox now. If you made it to the end of this ramble, Congratulations and Happy International Women's Day :)

Rules

I read a wonderful quote quite a while back that I really felt did a great job of summing up how I attempt to live my life and my outlook on the world.
So I thought I would share. It's a nice reminder sometimes.
Hope you enjoy it :)


1. Work at something you enjoy and that's worthy of your time and talent.
2. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
3. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
4. Be forgiving of yourself and others.
5. Be generous.
6. Have a grateful heart.
7. Persistence, persistence, persistence.
8. Discipline yourself to save money on even the most modest salary.
9. Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.
10. Commit yourself to constant improvement.
11. Commit yourself to quality.
12. Understand that happiness is not based on possessions, power or prestige, but on relationship with people you love and respect.
13. Be loyal.
14. Be honest.
15. Be a self-starter.
16. Be decisive even it it means you'll sometimes be wrong.
17. Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.
18. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did.
19. Take good care of those you love.
20. Don't do anything that wouldn't make your Mom proud.

H. Jackson Brown Jr.

5 Things I am looking Forward to This Spring

Living in the Pacific North West, it seems like the edge of Spring hovers just beyond reach for a really, really long time. We get nice days and we establish the hope that full fledged Spring will soon be upon us....and we wait and wait....
In New England it was a more definite change. After enduring month upon month of endless snow, slush and freezing rain, suddenly gray skies would give way to blue and the melting began. We knew.....here, we are never quite sure but always hopeful....

So I have been day dreaming about Spring and thought of the five main things I am looking forward to the most:

1. Getting the yard started: Our yard...oh our yard, it is a big slab of dirt and mud and cut down trees. We have a vision and after bringing in almost 30 loads of dirt last summer, I am hopeful things will move more quickly this Spring since we have a foundation.

2. Grilling Outside: We have a huge, amazing grill that means I don't have to cook inside. Whoo hoo! But more importantly it means that possible the hubs may cook...maybe....

3. Sunshine: I swear that nothing competes with the feel of sun on your skin.

4. Our Gardens: I have been harboring an inner gardener who is busting to get out. I have a bizillion books and I ogle the plant catalogs. This relates to point 1, since we still need to make the garden beds.

5. Sitting on my deck and watching the trees move in the breeze and watching a million amazing sunsets over the Olympic Mountains (I will do my best to keep the pictures to a minimum as it is well documented that I take far too many sunset pictures).

Living in Gratitude

Ok, so I get a little (a lot) of flack sometimes for my enthusiasm for life. Fair enough, I can be a little obnoxious sometimes, but I think with a little explanation will help to shed a little light ;)

I think there is a misconception that optimists are either:
1. just lucky people that don't encounter the hardships that others do or
2. they just don't live in reality.

Well I would argue that while there are many people living out in Lala land, the majority of those who choose to live optimistically are or have in the past made a conscious effort to change their thinking.
I can definitely attest to that fact that everyone encounters stress and challenges but it is how you view them that makes the difference.

For example work can be stressful and hectic for me, but instead of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted, I stop myself and think, "wow, I have a job that allows me to make an income, do something I love and care about and enables me to be able to help support my family and all the things we love to do". Huh...suddenly work doesn't seen so bad and that never ending stream of emails and tasks isn't a chore, but an opportunity.

I think all too often it is far easier to focus on the things that we don't have or the things we "have" to do, or whatever went wrong that day. I have definitely been guilty of going to bed and thinking about something stressful from the day. It's a not a great way to end the day and it is definitely not going to be a good way to start the next day.

The other night I was tucking in my disgruntled 6 year old. He gave me a laundry list of the things that had gone wrong that day (argument with brother, didn't get to pick the job he wanted at school, didn't get ice cream after dinner...). So there he sat with his lip out and I thought....OPPORTUNITY! It was so evident in this moment that it is not innate to be grateful and it is something we learn. So I asked him "what went right today? What made you happy?" He shrugs...ok....nudge...."Did you make a great art project?" Nods..."Did you play PS3?" Nods..."Did you play with your friends" Nods....Suddenly he is smiling and ending his day of a positive note. I said, "that is why you had a great day!".

Ok, that is enough for my public service announcement (for now)..Smile, seriously, what do you have to lose?

All Grow'd Up

Ok, I would like to say that I have been a horribly negligent blogger...yes it is true....I have slacked....I am sorry....ok, can we move on? Good! Glad we got that out of the way!

Today my baby girl is no longer a baby :( She is an amazingly chatty and brilliantly happy little 3 year old :)

3 years ago today she was born (much to my surprise) on her due date. Who knew that could happen?? Without being induced (who knew that could happen either???

She was bright eyed and peaceful right from the start. As soon as she could move she started to assess the situation and plot how she could establish control of these minions living in her house (her pink house at the time). She learned that with a delightfully high pitched shriek her brothers would drop whatever they were playing with and flee. Hmmmm this was an interesting start....She quickly rose through the ranks of siblings, establishing her ability to dominate any playtime, mealtime, bedtime situation. We quickly learned that raising boys and girls is very different!

She is a sweethearted and nurturing girl who will run to give hugs when you walk through the door and kisses boo-boos better.
She speaks in 10 word sentences and constantly has everyone in giggles.

I am so lucky to have such an amazing daughter :)

My New Adventure

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds, — and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of — wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there,
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air. . . .

Up, up the long, delirious burning blue
I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or ever eagle flew —
And, while with silent, lifting mind I've trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.

— John Gillespie Magee, Jr

A poem I memorized about 20 years ago. I loved it and it has resonated with me for years. Wouldn't it be amazing to have this experience to actual feel the sunlit silence??
Last week I made my dream a reality and started flight school and two days ago I flew my first airplane.
I was nervous beyond belief. Would I panic?? Would I vomit?? Nearly the minute we were off the ground my fears were gone and I was soaring. It was the most amazingly freeing and empowering moment. I am hooked!

Antiprocrastinationism

A friend of mine has spurred me on to start taking some initiative to do the things I have been long thinking of but have not put into action.
In recent years (and still now) the majority of my time is focused around others needs. I love it and being able to take care of my family, but there are also things that I have been putting off because they seem like "just one more thing".
But thanks to my friend I took a jump :)
I have long been a supporter of volunteer work and I really enjoy being around like minded people. People in human service volunteer settings are happy to be there and are doing something that they enjoy.
I took this nudge from a friend as a good opportunity to get back into the volunteer world. I sent in an application to be a volunteer advocate for children in the foster care system. I went for my interview last week and I was petrified! I hadn't been on that side of the interview table in several years. But about 5 minutes into it I was fine. Everyone was just as I had suspected, nice, warm and friendly. It just felt good to be there even if it was for an interview.
I am excited to start the trainings next month and more excited to be back into that world.
A big part of me would love to leave the corporate world and get back into non-profits, but at this point the hours and little pay would not be feasible, so this seems like a great compromise!

Now that this plan is in motion I will start on my next adventure!

A Little Slice O' Heaven

I have to admit that I have been dreaming of this house for a long time and putting a great deal of time and effort into fantasizing about how wonderfully peaceful it would be. I have to admit that I really got my hopes up about just how perfect this house would be and after a couple weeks in the house and much thought I have come to the conclusion that I was absolutely right. I LOVE it when that happens (it's infrequent so I relish).
It is quiet, calm, clean, and peaceful. We have amazing views and the air is clear and the night sky is speckled with stars! I had forgot how many after years of city life.

It is great to be able to step away from my desk and sit on the desk and just be there. I swear my level of stress has dropped about 10 points in the past week just by a location shift.
Ahhhhhhh home sweet home........

5 Things..that made me smile today

I enjoy random things and do my best to appreciate them in the moment and take them for what they are worth. I think often we just don't notice them or they fade/blend into all the other stuff.
Here are five things that made me smile today:

1. I was cutting the lawn for the last time in Massachusetts and I though "hey this isn't so bad" (even if it is a guys job!

2. I am bringing in the 7 recycle bins from the curb and I saw "made in Canada" on the handle. Of course they are made in Canada! Yay Canada!

3. I went to pick the boys up from school and as K and I are walking down the stairs to the playground and chatting I hear L's voice come from the bathroom "I'm pulling up my pants mom!". I giggled :) There were other parents there...they giggled too.

4. I just burnt my veggie burger after making great cheese burgers for the kids and thought "it's ok, it's just for me" and realized, I'm an ok mom.

5. We got word we may close on the house soon. That was awesome news :)

They Plan Ahead and Coordinate!

I have come to a startling conclusion today...my children plan, plot and then coordinate their acts of destruction!
Today was one disaster after another.
Finally I felt I had a 10 minute break to look at furniture online (so we'd have something in the new house). In that time the kitchen was flooded using tupperware and water from the watercooler and spatulas, the bathroom had been covered in liquid soap and they all had pudding and crackers....10 minutes folks!
Later L took the initiative to wash his own hair.....too bad it was in the toilet.....

Sensing my distress about the house looking like a disaster, A gets a mop and starts cleaning...only to have it turn into a jousting competition between him and L using a broom.

Is it almost bed time????

I swear no one can come up with these things on the spot. They must email and coordinate the night before. If 3 singletons can gang up on me this much imagine what John and Kate are in for...that brings me comfort in an odd way.....

5 Things Thursday...(Friday)

Ok, I have really become a blogger-slacker...not good. But at least I have a dear friend to sponge ideas off of to make the topics easier!

5 Things I love About my home

1. It's Big
There is no way around it. But at over 3000 SQ she is big and boy do we need it. A family of 5 that previously had 2 giant dogs...we had outgrown our top floor of a two family!
This house was a dream!

2. I like the yard
We have space (see #1). It is a fenced yard in back where the kids can rome free (avoid the poison ivy!)There are tons of BPT (big plastic thingys) and little grass and it is a beautiful (stressfree) combination.

3. It has history
This house is old. Over 100 years (about 1905). It has creaks, doors slam, there are footsteps...shadows move... it's interesting. There is so much original wood work and antique doors etc that make it so unique.

4. We have lived here longer than anywhere else. 3.5 years....although we are getting ready to leave, this house has been home for a long time and played a big role in our lives.

5. It's in a great location (and its affordable!).
We rent this house and we pay a great rate. The bus stops at the end of our drive way and you are in Harvard in 15 minutes. We have had the luxury of a great home while being able to save to buy our dream house. Can't beat that!

Current Projections

Periodically as the kids change I like to think about what their current character traits indicate about their future careers.

The current projections are as follows:

A is really into furniture and organizing and decorating. He moves things around his room and will rearrange the furniture and then proudly shows off the changes.
So at this point it is looking like he will be an interior designer. I am looking forward to that!

L is really into clothes and fashion. He has to pick out his clothes and makes sure that things coordinate and that he has the right shoes to match. It's great!
It's looking like fashion design is in his future (Yay!)

K the princess. She is funny and rowdy and fearless....so at this point we are guessing she is going for a career as a professional wrestler.

Clandestine Altruism..Pay it Forward

I think the majority of the world has a good heart and those that don't have simply misplaced it and need to find it again.
Ok, I can feel the collective eyes of the Nation rolling before me, but just give me a second.
We all have those moments where we see something or hear something and think "glad that's not me" or "someone should do something"..etc....
But we have turned into more private human beginnings rather that the community focused people that we used to be.
Ok, I have deviated a little from my original intent...
My point is that it takes very little to make a difference in someone else's day. Think about all those turning points you have had where a good day turns to bad...now think of what could have been done to prevent that or make it go in a completely positive direction.....

This has become my latest mission. I have taken to clandestine altruism that I want to accept no gratitude for, I simply hope it gets paid forward somehow and the chain continues.
My big thing has been plugging other people's meters. I got a parking ticket last week and it ruined my day. For some reason I just brood on those things. Today I parked in the same spot (by the post office), plugged my meter and notice the car behind me had an expired meter so I put in a quarter. Maybe they came out and said "whoo hoo I didn't get a ticket suckers!", but maybe they came out and said "hey there's time on the meter, I didn't do that... that's nice, I'll do something nice now"...
I don't know, maybe I am hoping, but I think that nothing bad can come from trying.

Where's the Pause Button?

Ok, I swear I just got out of bed this morning and someone hit fast forward. There are so many days like this lately where I get out of bed and hit auto pilot and the next thing I know I am looking at the clock and it is 1pm!
I feel like I have been living at break neck pace over the past few years and the speed just keeps picking up.
I can't really complain since this is all self-inflicted and I truly enjoy all of it I just wish there was enough time to not only accommodate it all, but also to enjoy it. What's the secret?? Do you have to give some up to enjoy the rest? I just couldn't do it. I have such a great career doing what I love and being in business for myself is a dream because I feel like I have the control that a Type A like myself needs....but the family is without a question the priority. I thought I would get better at the balance as I gained more experience and developed more systems to make the equation work, but it seems as though the variables are always changing. There are always those moments of perfect balance where the to-do list is cleared, the email is at a manageable number and the house is spotless. And then comes a new variable...That is all self-inflicted as well, I suppose. I could have chosen a path of a job that is consistent and 9-5 M-F, but I don't think that would have made the grade for me. Perhaps I should have focused more in calculus on how to make the equations balance! Or perhaps that is the meaning of life....to focus and find that ultimate equation of balance.....Ok, that was a little deeper than I intended :)

Hooligan Antics

I named this blog because of all the hilarious episodes in our house...
One example is this evening while I was putting everyone to bed. We have a routine. Everyone brushes teeth then goes upstairs to go to the bathroom then we tuck KJ in, then L and then A. All is going on schedule until I get to KJs room and there is L pretending to sleep in her bed :0 Big giggles....ok, we get KJ to bed, then off to L's room, but WAIT L is in A's bed! Oh the Shenanigans.
So there was much giggling and rearranging this evening! L has quite the sense of humor which has developed over the past few months. He was previously shy and quiet and as his teacher puts it "he has come out of his shell".
It's great :) He is hilarious and keeps us all on our toes.

Intro

Ok...so I have given into the world of blogging. I figure that everyone is so spread out geographically and I tend to communicate most over the computer that this is a great solution. Plus the entertainment factor proves to be promising with all the chaos and continual change in our household :)
So a little background....
I am a wife of one and a mother of three (Aidan, Liam and Kiera). These are the hooligans that create the shenanigans. It is a busy life and I wouldn't have it any other way.
I have spent about 19 years of my life going to school and I am thinking about going back. There is just too much to learn and too much I want to do!
I am the co-owner of two companies (Neill is my business partner) Boston ABA Inc and Advantage Learning Group Inc. Both companies provide educational and behavioral support services to kids with autism. It is busy and we love what we do :)
Oh, we are prepping for a move across the country. We have zig zagged a couple times across the continent and I swear, this is it. I want to be settled and have the kids have a conhort to go through school with.